Three Good Books....

They say that you will be the same person in 5 years as you are today....EXCEPT for the people you meet, the places you travel, and the books you read. I love books. They have the ability to take you to a place and time you have never been, they can make you cry, laugh out loud, they can consume your every waking  moment until the last page...and as I have said before, I love the feel of an actual book. I love to turn the pages. I also love to roam my local library, bringing home treasures for my bedside table.

Recently, I've read three amazing books. They are all very different but, they have all touched me in ways I never knew they would. I am not the same person I was before I read them. And I wanted to share them with you.

The first one is Two Kisses for Maddy by Matthew Logelin. I had read about it in a magazine review and it immediately piqued my interest...although, I knew it would be a tear-jerker. It is a true story based on the love affair of the author and his wife, Liz. They are high school sweethearts, they get married, get pregnant and are just about to live happily ever after, when the unthinkable happens. Liz delivers a baby girl and 27 hours later, dies instantly from a pulmonary embolism, just as she is getting ready to go meet her new baby in ICU. It is so sad...the kind of "cry out loud sobbing" kind of book. But, yet so beautifully written and the story so poignantly told that you can't help but continue on. Sometimes, it is good to read something like this...it helps put your own life in perspective. It makes you see beyond your own problems and worries and focus on what's really important. I lent the book to my dear friend and she texted me later saying "this is not a good book to read on an airplane, I am sobbing uncontrollably, and people are staring at me!" It really is worth every single tear you will cry. Go out and get it.

The second one is The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin. One afternoon, when I had an hour to kill at Barnes and Noble, I came across this book. I read the back cover and knew it was a book I wanted to own (not just check out at the library). I sat at Barnes and Noble and read it, bought the book, and came home and read it some more. The whole idea behind the book is that people really do not appreciate what they have, usually until it is gone. The author has dedicated an entire year of her life trying to find the secrets to happiness. She says "The days are long, but the years are short"...which is so true, especially when you are in the throes of motherhood. It made me stop and think, "I really need to learn how to live in the moment and get more out of life and enjoy my children more." Her chapters cover everything from "keeping a contented heart" to "lightening up". So much of what she says resonated with me that I knew I had to keep this book nearby and refer to it often. I also signed up for her newsletter and daily "Happiness" quote. I love opening my email everyday and seeing these little gems!! Sometimes I re-post them on facebook to share with friends - other times, I write them down for later. One of my favorites is: "I begin to suspect that the world is divided not only into the happy and unhappy, but into those who like happiness and those who, as odd as it seems, really don't". - C.S. Lewis. She also offers this little nugget of wisdom: "Feeling right is about living the life that's right for you - in occupation, location, marital status, and so on. It's also about virtue, doing your duty, living up to the expectations you set for yourself." Love that!

The last book, is called Mile Markers by Krtistin Armstrong. This book outlines the 26.2 most important reasons that women run. I had seen a review in Runner's World magazine and was immediately intrigued. The author, Lance Armstrong's ex-wife, is also a contributor to the magazine and she posts a weekly blog, by the same name. I got this book from the library and could not put it down. She was so "spot on" with all of her observations. There was one particular section I loved and have since quoted many, many times! She talks about how her running pals were discussing the benefits of turning 40 (the author at the time was 38) and how excited she was to get to that milestone. Here are some of the things they said....

"You do the things you used to talk about but never did. You quit playing small. You spend time with the friends who lift you up and cut loose the ones who bring you down. You finally wake up and realize that you are as hot as you are going to get in this lifetime, so you might as well enjoy it."

I don't know what it is about that last statement that makes me so happy, but ever since I read that, I feel lighter and more carefree than ever. At 46, I feel like I am finally starting to understand that saying about "feeling comfortable in your own skin"....and I don't want to look back in 10 years and say "Wow, I really had it going on ... wish I had known it/appreciated it at the time!" Now is the time to OWN all of it, to look in the mirror and say "I like what I see." It's time to take back our confidence as women and be proud of our bodies and all the amazing things they can do, from running marathons to pushing out babies. It's time to look past the superficial wrinkle lines, acne scars, cellulite, whatever it is that causes us grief ...and say "I am ALL that and I am enough just the way I am!" Amen.

All 3 of these books have the same central theme of living in the moment, appreciating what is right in front of us, because at any moment, it can all be gone. They teach us that life is precious and that none of us has the right to take a single breath for granted. God did not promise us that life would be easy...but, He did promise that it would be worth it.



Recipe for the perfect girls weekend...

Start with:
8 Gamma Phi Betas (from 1980-somthin')
1 Roll of Caution Tape

Add:
1 case of Coors Lite
1 Batch of homemade bloody mary's

Combine with:
Equal parts laughter, tears and nostalgia

And top it off with:
1 Rockin' 80's playlist

I just returned from a fabulous weekend with 7 of my college, sorority sisters...We had the best time! I have not laughed that hard in a long time!

Here are a few things I learned:

10. A celery stalk & an olive does not constitute lunch!
9. When the bartender refuse to serve you, you will thank him in the morning.
8. Caution tape on a group of 8 gals is funny and cute...sitting alone on a bleacher with caution tape wrapped around you, is just plain creepy...and awkward!
7 AMF. Alcohol Makes Friends. 'Nuff said.
6. There is a cardboard duck missing from the hotel lobby. I know nothing.
5. Asking people if they "are there for the duck game" is a great icebreaker.
4. I have no idea what the Duck Knows, but it's a great slogan.
3. Dancing on the hotel bed with a group of gals, beats dancing at a club any night.
2. Going to bed at 10pm after drinking for 12 hours is a good idea.
and #1 thing I learned this weekend....(drum roll, please...)
1. Time and distance don't stand a chance against the bonds that are created amongst sorority sisters.

Thank you to all my Gamma Phi sista friends for coming out to play this weekend....I enjoyed every minute, it was food for my soul and music to my heart. I can hardly wait for our next adventure!!! Hugs to you all, Margie

The 12th Race...

A year ago today, I couldn't have run from a burning building to save my life. Today, I ran my 12th race! It feels so good to look back and see how far I've come in the past year...MS or not, running has been a huge accomplishment for this 46 year old gal!

I'm one of those people who has to have a  goal to work towards or I will lose all my motivation to keep at it. At the beginning of this year, I told myself I'd run a race a month...and I did it!! Some months, I even ran two! So far, I've conquered 8 5ks, 3 10ks and a Half Marathon! I made a point to run the entire race - no matter what...and if I walked at all, I told myself, I couldn't hang my number on my "wall of fame". So far, all 12 bibs have made it to the wall!

I love everything about the race...I love signing up for it and writing it down on my calendar, I love picking up my bib number and t-shirt the day before the race and seeing people I know at the running store, I love the pre-race excitement that I feel, I love lining up at the start line and taking off, I love crossing the finish line...and I absolutely LOVE the feeling of accomplishment once it's over! I love waking up the next day, checking the sports section to see where I finished...The whole experience is so worth the entry fees to me!

Racing, to me, is the best way to gauge where I was last month and where I am right now. It gives me the push I need to keep running and training...and there is just something about a race that makes it virtually impossible for me to stop and walk.

Today's race was especially poignant. It happened to fall on the 10 year anniversary of 9/11 so, no matter how tough it was, or how hot it got, I had to remind myself that there were thousands of people who went through a whole lot worse, ten years ago. When I found myself complaining of the heat, I had to remember those people who tried to flee the Twin Towers and were unable to or the heroes who went down in that Pennsylvania field. I had absolutely no right to complain...

I just felt gratitude to be running and to have been given the chance to live another day.

Racing keeps me on track.

"We are shaped and fashioned by what we love." -Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Free to a Good Home...

I have been wanting to write a little somethin' about our dog, Maggie....and what better day to do it than her 4th birthday!!

We got Maggie in December of 2007 when she was 12 weeks old. Our kids had been bugging us for a dog for awhile now and we finally caved! My husband had been at a local pet store (where he was selling advertising) and saw a flyer on the bulletin board, advertising puppies. The sign read "Free to A Good Home" so, he tore off the phone number and the next thing you know, we had a puppy!

Maggie is a lab mix...her mama is a chocolate lab and her daddy is well, ...we aren't really sure since he didn't stick around long enough to meet us! But, we are pretty sure he was a pit bull, as Maggie's face definitely has some pit bull-ness in it.

Since bringing her home, she has been everything BUT free!! She immediately chewed everything in sight....hot tub cover, garden hose, cords, many pairs of shoes, swim trunks, undergarments, etc....We finally built her a kennel outside to stay in when we weren't home because she couldn't be trusted to roam the backyard at will.

The next thing we bought her was an expensive, re-chargeable bark collar because the neighbors complained that she barked when we were not home. Who knew? We thought she was content as could be in her little 4-walled cozy kennel outside!

Throughout the first few years, my husband and I would joke that, although she was "free to a good home", she had cost us an arm and leg...but, we always agreed that at the end of the day, she was well worth it. Each night as she would snuggle into her position at the bottom of our queen-sized bed, and give out a little sigh once she got comfortable, we would both look at each other and say, "She's a good dog...and we wouldn't trade her for the world."

Last summer, Maggie got into a little trouble with the law. She was out front, off-leash with my husband while he puttered around in the garage...Suddenly a guy went flying down the street on a skateboard at about 50 miles an hour, holding onto 2 leashes with dogs attached. Maggie, of course, went running after them..."Heck, she'd never seen such a thing like this and wanted to see up-close what the heck this was!!" Unfortunately, the 3 dogs started going at it, the guy, trying to do the right thing, and trying to get Maggie away from his dogs, started kicking and hitting our dog ... and Maggie bit the guy on the hand. After several minutes, the ruckus was over...but, my poor husband who witnessed the whole scene, was distraught and upset to say the least. I still remember him coming in and telling me about it, shaking and close to tears.

The next morning, as I was getting out of the shower, my 9yr. old daughter came in the bathroom and said, "Mommy, there's a policeman at the door who needs to talk to you." Now we all know, nothing good has ever come for those words, so I quickly got dressed and brushed my hair and went to the front door. Sure enough, the guy had pressed charges and we had been summoned to court to deal with the whole mess. In the mean time, the dog had to be quarantined and could only go on walks around the neighborhood and MUST be on leash at all times.

One night, when my husband was taking Maggie for a walk, he came face to face with the bitten skateboarder...He lived 3 doors down from us!!! Talk about awkward!!

Well, the day came and we went to Doggie Court. We told the judge our story, we groveled, we apologized...and in the end, they dropped 2 of the 3 charges...but, the biggest one, being "Dog At Large" set us back a few hundred dollars. We were also told that Maggie had to have a chip put in her (expensive!), that she would be labeled a "dangerous dog" and we had to put up signs on our fence, warning people about our dangerous dog. She also was sentenced to a "life of doggie probation" where in which she can never be off-leash again, except at the dog park (since the incident didn't happen at the park).We left the courtroom, tail between our legs, paid our fine, and just looked at each other, saying..."Free to a good home, Really?"

Since that incident, Maggie has been a model citizen. She never leaves the house without a leash. She hasn't bit another living creature since, and she still continues to charm and win us over every chance she gets!! She no longer gets to run free along the river and chase squirrels or chase the waves at the beach, but she still seems pretty happy and we'd like to think she has a pretty good life! We love you, Maggie...you can be a total pain in the ass at times, but we wouldn't have it any other way..."Happy Birthday, Sweetie!! Woof! Woof!"

The good ol' days are here and now...

All I want is to freeze time. In a few short days, my son will be a HS senior and my daughter will be beginning her last year of elementary school. Wow! Talk about wanting time to stand still...I have never before felt so excited for my children's new adventures, or been so afraid of them slipping away. It is a weird feeling, because I know that a year from now, my baby boy will be heading off to college, moving into his dorm room, beginning a life of his own as an adult. And, my beautiful daughter will be heading off into what I think is one of the toughest times of a girl's life....middle school. So, I need to focus on the here and now...I don't want a single day to go by without truly soaking up and breathing in the fact that both of my kids are home with us, under one roof, right where they belong. I want to live in the moment, I want to savor everything from making their lunches, to watching their dance recitals and football games, to listening at their door at night to see if they are asleep...I really wish I could freeze time, but I know I can't. I guess, part of our jobs as mother's is giving our kids wings to fly when we are not there. I just have to hope that I've done my job well enough...that I gave my children the right tools to go out in this big, scary world. And, then of course, I need to give it all up to God because I know He is the one who is truly in control.

I am so excited to see what kind of people my kids will become...to live vicariously through their experiences as they greet life head on. I already plan on going to visit my son every weekend in college...much to his disdain!! Why can't every weekend be MOM's weekend? hee hee

I think, too many times we look back on things and wish we had enjoyed it more .. or truly appreciated it. Not until later, do we realize, those really were the good ol' days, and we should have enjoyed them more. I don't want to make that mistake...although, I know that life gets busy and sometimes, the reality of everyday life is hard. I know I will get caught up in petty worries or silly stuff that really isn't important, that will detract from this special time of our lives. I need to remind myself that I won't get these days back. Like it or not, my kids are growing up and sooner than later, they will be leaving the nest we built. I can only hope that they will fly home to visit often.

Life is good. Hug your kids. Enjoy the chaos. It really doesn't get any better than RIGHT NOW!

School Supply Shopping...a great opportunity to teach our kids about finances!

Today was the day to go school supply shopping. Now, this day is often dreaded by parents all across the country....I however, am what you might call a "school supply geek!" I get such a rush out of smelling newly sharpened pencils, or running my hand across a bright yellow folder...and don't even get me started on the calendars. Remember that line from, "You've got mail" where Tom Hanks tells Meg Ryan he will send her a box of freshly sharpened pencils?" Ooooohhh, that man knows how to woo a girl! You had me at freshly sharpened, Tom!

So, today was that day...only this year, my 10-year old daughter didn't just want to go with me...she wanted to make an entire day of it with her best friend and us moms, go out to lunch at Olive Garden, maybe ice cream after that. So, we set out, starbucks in our system, school supply list in hand, credit card in wallet. It started out pretty routine, the girls finding #2 pencils and glue sticks and tossing them in the cart without much thought...but, when it came time for the spiral notebooks...Watch out! They wanted glam, they wanted cute, they wanted the spiral with the most curly q's and color they could find. In other words, they wanted the most expensive ones. I asked them how much they were, to which my daughter replied, "I don't know, it doesn't matter." Immediately, the hairs on my neck stood up. I said in my best mom voice, "You would care if you were the one paying for all this." So, they dutifully checked the price and said "They are only $1.29 each"...Okay, they had won that battle - now it was time to move onto the erasers and folders. Now, they have these great folders in all different colors, for 25 cents each which are just fine....but, of course they wanted "cute" folders...so, they went for the 99cent folders. We tried our best to get the girls to split items like glue sticks and dry erase markers...which we did so with some success. They drew the line though, with the huge packet of pencil top erasers, claiming they had different color tastes in these pencil-toppers. When I was a kid, erasers came in one color...pearl pink. And, I had one of those yellow peechees with sports figures on the front. I think we got them at school office, don't really remember shopping for them and I certainly didn't have a choice in the matter.

We continued on down each aisle, crossing things off our list, until we had found everything on our list. Then, as we approached the check-out counter, we eyed some plain spiral notebooks, for a penny each! Now, this was the perfect opportunity to teach our kids about the value of a dollar (or penny in this case!) They had picked out the "cute" colorful patterned spirals earlier for 1.29 each. We tried to explain to them that (4) notebooks at 1.29 cost over 5 dollars, while (4) of the penny ones were a mere 4 cents!! Well, let's just say they were not impressed with our quick math skills and were holding tight to the cotton candy, plaid poly, hot chocolate, polka dotted spiral notebooks (that really are named these 'catchy' little names just to lure in fashion-conscious little girls!) They wanted nothing to do with the bland, one-color, same number of pages spirals for a penny. In the end, we compromised...we let them keep (2) of the pretty pads and we made them put back (2) and replace them with (2) of the borings. But, not before they both grumbled and complained that we were single handedly ruining their 5th grade year before it even started!! But, hey we saved $2.56 and that made me happy.

On our way to check-out, I heard things like: "How come you won't let me get what I want?" "Why does it always have to be all about you?" I turned to my daughter and said in my calmest mom voice, "It's not about me trying to ruin your last year of elementary school and it's really not even about me trying to show you who holds the purse strings in the family (although, we all know who does!)...it's about me wanting us to be able enjoy the lifestyle we have and about us being able to have a roof over our head. Would you rather have a rad, colorful binder or a house to sleep in everynight?" That quieted her for a few seconds - long enough to check out in peace anyway.

At the check-out counter, the cashier asked me if I'd like to swap my Elmer's glue bottle for the store brand which is only a nickel. I was so thrilled at saving approx. $1.12 on a bottle of glue, that I almost jumped across the counter and kissed her!

We finally made it out the door with all of our supplies for...$38.14 which totally (and pleasantly) surprised me! I had planned to spend twice that (but don't tell my daughter!!)

Happy New School Year!!!

Tysabri, Take Me Away!

Is it sad that I actually look forward to my monthly IV drug infusion for my MS? I sort of look at it like I would a day at the spa! I bring my little bag of goodies: magazines, book, reading glasses, crosswords...and just sit back in the recliner and RELAX...for 2 hours...without kids!! Man, if that's not livin' I don't know what is!! If I want, I ask for a blankie and take a little snooze...I can ask the nurse to turn on the TV...I can ask for one of those yummy candies they keep in a jar at the front desk...It really is HEAVEN! The only thing missing is a plush white robe and a big jar of cucumber water...but, hey, I can't get picky now!

I am now on month 5 of a new drug, called Tysabri. It is a once a month IV-infused drug...the actual drug itself takes about an hour and then, they have to sit and watch me for an hour afterwards. Not really sure what they are looking for...maybe for my eyes to roll back in my head or for my head to actually explode...but, I humor them and wait as long as they need me to wait. Hey, I am in no hurry to get home and fix dinner! (I score major sympathy points from my family when I walk in the front door at 6pm with a bandage wrapped around my arm - you can bet I am going to MILK this for as long as I can!!)

All kidding aside, there is a very rare brain infection that can occur with this drug...which has been fatal for some. This is VERY RARE though and the chances of it happening to me are next to nill. The way I look at it is like this: "Life is short, you could walk outside right now and get run over by a car...and be dead...so, with everything in life, there are risks. And, the way that this drug makes me feel is worth every second of worry over getting this rare brain infection." When I tell people I have MS, sometimes they look all worried and say "Is it fatal?" I tell them, "Life is fatal...none of us are getting out of here alive!" That usually stops them in their tracks or atleast gets them to buy me a beer!!

I love life...and I want my quality of life to be as good as it can for as long as it can!! Right now, Tysabri is working for me. Since starting on this drug, I have had no MS symptoms or side effects whatsoever so, for me, this is about as good as it gets!! I thank God that I am able to go in once a month for this wonder drug! It may not be a day at the spa, but it comes damn close!!