MS Doesn't mean "No Mas"!!

Recently, I have been doing my best to just forget that I have MS. Training for and running my second half marathon (last weekend) makes me feel rather "studly" and makes me feel strong and invincible! I usually don't even think about having MS until my monthly IV. And, then, I'm like "Wait a minute, Why am I sitting in this chair with a needle in my arm? Oh yeah, I have MS!" I sit there for a couple hours and then I walk out the door and go on with my life.

MS is a funny thing. I have heard it referred to as the "But you look so good" disease! Which is a blessing and a curse. It is a blessing because to the outside world, I look normal. I can walk, run, jump and do pretty much anything any of my friends can do...Okay, let's be honest, I often do MORE than any of my friends in a given day. On the other hand, though, it can be a curse because no one really knows just how much it sucks! As much as people try to empathize, unless they've been in my shoes, they just don't know. They don't know the fear that I know. The fear of uncertainty...wondering if I'll end up in a wheelchair someday, wondering if my children will get this disease, or wondering how long I will feel this good. Come to think of it, those are things we all worry about, MS or not, right?

 I consider myself very lucky because at the moment, I don't really have any glaring symptoms (thanks to my medication!) and I feel pretty normal. But, there are times that I'll be laying in bed and cannot feel my lower legs and feet. When I wake up in the morning, it is a bit hard to get my bearings. I stagger to the bathroom...a little unsteady on my feet. There are times when I forget things...mostly short-term stuff, like "why did I walk in this room?" or "what in the hell was I looking for just now?" Then, there are those times when I will be searching frantically for my expensive sunglasses, only to have someone (usually a small child) say, "Aren't those them on your head?" I truly don't know if I can blame MS for all of these mishaps or if some of it is just the natural progression of age. I imagine that it's a little of both.

I guess what I'm trying to get across is that even though I have MS, it does not dictate how I live my life. Life is uncertain for all of us. No one knows what tomorrow will bring. I don't use it as an excuse to not try new things or push myself beyond my limitations...rather, I use it as motivation to go further. I run because I know that someday, my legs may not be as strong and capable as they are today. I do crosswords everyday because I know that someday, my mind may not be as clear as it is today. I try to greet each day with excitement because I know what it's like to want to crawl back under the covers and hide from the world...when it hurts just to get out of bed. I am thankful that God has given me another day, a day that I feel good. MS has been such a gift - a reminder that life is fragile and that everything can change in the blink of an eye. A reminder that none of us is guaranteed tomorrow and we have no right to take a single moment for granted. A reminder to seize the day!

So, just for today, I am going to forget that I have MS. One day at a time, baby. One day at a time.

Taking a break from my busy day to get a stinkin'  IV! And yes, I am rockin' a pair of cowboy boots with my sundress!!