I need to take some ginkgo biloba...if I could just remember to!

I am a "list" girl. I swear, I have at the very minimum five TO DO lists going at all times...and, in addition to that, about 3 different calendars of what's going on in my life. I would be lost without my lists. My memory is good...despite the fact that I am getting older and that I have MS. But, if I don't write something down, I'm really likely to just forget it completely! Then, there are those moments of pure and utter brain farts! One time I was at a ski show, I was looking at all the cool stuff, trying it on, and I had a moment of panic! I couldn't find my purse. Since I had been trying things on, I couldn't be sure where I'd left it. The place was packed with people. I ran around frantically for about 5 minutes, then ran up to one of the cashiers and said "I can't find my purse!" He looked at me, then looked down and back at me and said, "Ummm, is that it on your shoulder?" Another time, I came in from recess duty at the school I work at, and was frantically looking for my sunglasses. After several minutes of searching, I asked a co-worker if they'd seen my glasses. She politely replied, "I believe they are on your head." Well, that wasn't as bad as the time I was actually wearing my glasses and searching for them at the same time...Just the other day, I was trying to charge my phone and cursing at it because it would not hold a charge. I continued to ram the silver tab in and out of the phone, getting madder and madder that it would not charge. Finally, my daughter came in the room and said "Uh, mom, it might help if the charger was plugged in." Ahhhhh, senior moments, MS brain farts, too much drinking in college, whatever it may be...I have heard that ginkgo biloba helps with memory problems. Problem is I just keep forgetting to take it! Hell, truth is, I keep forgetting to buy it because it's not on my list!

Thank God for Rear View Mirrors, Right?

Okay, so my car rear view mirror is a friend and a foe! The other day while waiting to pick my daughter up from dance class, I was sitting in the car doing a crossword puzzle. I happened to have my reading glasses on, well, because I can't see a darned thing without them! I made the mistake of looking into my car's rear view mirror...now, us women know that the car is the best place to check for errant eyebrow hairs, chin hairs, lipstick smears and too much rouge application because of the natural light in the car. Well, much to my horror, and because I happened to be wearing my bifocals....I saw something that scared the absolute you-know-what out of me!! There on my left cheek, was a curly, wiry, unruly....black hair sticking out!! My immediate thought was "Oh my God, how long has that been there and who all has seen it?" Geez, what is it about your mid 40's that make strange and random hairs pop EVERYWHERE? As I looked closer in the mirror, I was traumatized by all the imperfections I saw in magnified up-closeness - it was like a train wreck, I couldn't bare to watch, but I couldn't take my eyes off it!! When I got home, I did what any self-respecting girl would do, I plucked that sucker right off my cheek and vowed that I would never, ever wear my glasses and look in that damn rear view mirror at the same time. Some things really are better left unseen...

Blogger Virgin

Hi all, this is my very first BLOG ever!! I have been wanting to start a blog for awhile now, but never seemed to find the time to sit down and do it. Well, after talking with a friend today, I got inspired...I came home and put my daughter's 9 year old friend to work and ... "Voila! My blog was created!!" :) Amazing what you can get done when you put your mind to it (or when you put a child to it! he hee)

My blog name is "Am I A Mess"? Well, let me explain. My maiden name is MIMS...and when you spell it out, it actually says the phrase. I was made aware of that in college, by one of my best friends when we were at a frat party! We had consumed many adult beverages (even though, we ourselves were not really adults!) and we were having a really good time. She said "Hey, when you spell your last name, its says: "Am I A Mess?" I laughed and said ... "Oh yes, YES I AM!!!" And from there, the phrase was born.

Fast forward 15 years...it's 1998 ~ and I get diagnosed with a really rude disease called "MS." It hits you like a ton of bricks, slowly takes away your abilities, robs you of your energy, all the while acting all quiet and non-chalant about it. Once again, the phrase seemed to fit my life...only this time it said: "Am I MS?" To which I quickly answered, "Oh no, NO I AM NOT."

Well, it's been 13 years since that fateful day...and I have to say I am not MS...but I do have MS...and believe it or not, MS has been one of the biggest blessings in my life! It has made me realize that life is precious and that I should never, ever take a single day for granted. It has helped me live in the moment because truly, that is all any of us really have. It has made me appreciate my good health when I have it ... and fight for better health when I don't. It sounds ironic, but having MS has made me stronger. It forces me to try and attempt things I would never have dreamed of doing - all to prove this damned disease wrong!! And, to prove to the world that "I AM NOT MS...or a MESS" for that matter!

Recently, I took up running. I actually took a class called "Learn to Run" at a local running store. I had never in my life been a runner, nor had I ever wanted to be. Well, 9 months later, I've run 5 5ks, a 10k, and just finished my first Half Marathon!! I feel like running has given me a new lease on life and I just laugh at MS every time I run and don't trip or fall!! It's sort of like saying "FU, MS" with all due respect, of course!!!:)

So, my life right now is all about running and all about trying to stay healthy and motivated and manage this damned disease...did I mention, it's a very rude disease??!

I hope I can offer some inspiration, some laughs, maybe even some tears, while on this journey! So, hold on tight...."Here we go!"